I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the bone. And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold. And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker. What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man? Homer no function beer well without.

Why do you think that she is a witch? He hasn’t got shit all over him. Well, I didn’t vote for you. A newt? Look, my liege! I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!